铁观音笑话

1.今天和媳妇有点小矛盾。她说:“今晚你不用睡地板了！”我说:“这么好？我今晚就睡在床上？”她说:“真漂亮！你给我出去露宿街头！”我:“哎！天空如此明亮！地好辽阔啊！我睡大街你睡床上！”她:“哼。”我心想:“今晚终于可以去网吧玩了！”‍‍‍‍‍‍

2.有一天，他上铺的室友实在忍无可忍了，对他说:“兄弟，你看你能收拾吗？洗澡洗脸用同一条毛巾没问题，为什么还用洗脸毛巾？那擦擦脚呢？”

3.吃饭时，邻桌一对年轻夫妇坐下，男孩摩拳擦掌，接过菜单，翻了翻，合上:我看废话少，点我以前爱吃的怎么样？女孩拉着脸瞪着眼:胡说什么？你在跟谁说话，少废话，少废话！我...这场争吵打了个措手不及！

4.今天，我九岁的表弟来我家玩。我妈妈做了很多美味的食物。炸龙虾有点辣，表哥就叫我去了。我觉得她好搞笑，问:你们四川人都应该吃辣。表哥问我萌萌:山东人都开挖掘机吗...Kika，这个问题让我不知所措，没问题

5.半夜，在公交车上，一个老头突然拉着一个美女的手，说她偷了他的钱包，要下车解释。美女看着车上的人表情僵硬，眼神无情，顿时以为公交车遇到鬼了。下车后，美女看了看四周漆黑一片，道:“兄弟，刚才车上是不是全是鬼？谢谢你救了我。我们现在怎么回去？”，我先给你看一条金鱼，呵呵。“说...

1. I had a little conflict with my daughter-in-law today. She said, "You don't have to sleep on the floor tonight!" I said, "So good? I'll sleep in bed tonight?" She said, "It's beautiful! You go out and sleep on the street for me!" Me: "Hey! The sky is so bright! The ground is so vast! I sleep on the street and you sleep on the bed!" She: "Humph." I thought to myself: "I can finally go to the Internet cafe tonight to play!"‍‍‍‍‍‍

2. One day, the roommate on his upper bunk couldn't bear it anymore and said to him: "Brother, do you think you can clean up? It's okay to use the same towel for bathing and face-washing, why do you still use the face-washing towel? What about wiping your feet?"

3. At dinner, a young couple at the adjacent table sat down, the boy was gearing up, took over the menu, flipped through it and closed it: I think it's less nonsense, and how about ordering the ones that I used to love? The girl pulled her face and stared: What nonsense? Who are you talking to, less nonsense, less nonsense! I... this quarrel was caught off guard!

4. Today, my nine-year-old cousin came to my house to play. My mother made a lot of delicious food. The fried lobster was a little spicy, so my cousin called me there. I thought she was so funny and asked: You Sichuan people should all eat spicy food. My cousin asked me Mengmeng: Do all people in Shandong drive excavators...Kika, this question left me at a loss, no problem

5. In the middle of the night, on the bus, an old man suddenly took a beautiful woman's hand and said that she stole his wallet and had to get off the bus to explain. The beauty looked at the people in the car with stiff expressions and ruthless eyes, and suddenly thought that the bus had encountered a ghost. After getting out of the car, the beautiful woman looked at the dark surroundings and said, "Brother, was the car full of ghosts just now? Thank you for saving me. How do we get back now?" , I'll show you a goldfish first, hehe." Saying...